26 December 2007

5 Worst Songs of 2007

5. Fergie: "Glamorous" - Fergie teaches us how spell again and "if you don't have no money take your broke ass home" (broke broke in the censored version - Huh? WTF?). Nod to the casting of Freddy Rodriguez of Six Feet Under.

4. Soulja Boy: "Crank That" - I've only heard this once or twice and I can't make it all the way though it, it's sooooo bad. Apparently its got an accompanying dance that Ellen DeGeneres has got a hold of on her show, which is surprising that it's making its way into middle age moms' ears, given that it's so unlistenable.

3. Avril LaVigne: "(Hey Hey You You I Wanna Be Your) Girlfriend" - Now try to get this earworm out of your head. Just try.

2. Rhianna: "Umbrella" - 'Nuf Ced.

1. Sean Kingston: "Beautiful Girls" - This song was inescapable this summer. It had not only one but two censored versions here in America: one with the word "suicidal" muted and one replacing "suicidal" with "in denial", which is even worse. To think that this country is so politically correct that uptight parents are so up in arms about the word "suicidal" in the chorus, they actually think that kids hearing the word might get them to go on and do the deed. Not suprisingly, these censored versions more often than not appeared on Rupert Murdoch's conservative ClearChannel station evil empire.

Happy Boxing Day! Feel free to list any honorable mentions in the comments - any songs you'd like to rid your memory of for this year?

10 comments:

Redbeard76 said...

Honorable mention I forgot to add: "Gimme More" - everything that's wrong with pop music. Absolutely laughable.

Ted D said...

Stephen, glad to see you had a safe Holiday and are back at home. Did Sierra know anything was going on?

I'm sad to say I have heard exactly NONE of the songs on your list; I'm strictly a talk show guy. Two local guys in the am, and sports talk and Opie and Anthony the rest of the time. At home, my house is dominated by Miley Cyrus and the like.

It'll happen to you one day too!

Redbeard76 said...

For about a year I listened to talk radio everyday, no music - Howard Stern in the morning, Bubba the Love Sponge in the afternoon (yes the guy who broke the Aubrey Huff interview).

I got bored of it after awhile and went back to music, and the only reason why I've heard these crappy songs is because my wife still listens to top 40 radio and she takes control over the radio if we're riding together. You know as well as I do, if the wife isn't happy, nobody's happy. But yeah, be glad you haven't heard these tunes.

I try to sneak in my music if she falls asleep while I drive.

I didn't do too much driving this weekend. My dad came up to visit us on the 23rd, we drove 1.5 hours over to family in Lyndonville, VT in the lovely Northeast Kingdom on Christmas Eve, then Christmas day drove the 1/2 hour to my father-in-law two towns over.

Cake said...

I LOVE that the only song I know on your list is the "Soulja Boy" one...and I only heard 20 seconds of that before my ears started bleeding and I went mercifully deaf.

Since I'm obviously blissfully ignorant of current music, lemme just throw my vote to anything by Celine Dion. ::shudder::

Ted D said...

You must have a Sirius radio with Howard and Bubba.

When we are together it's usally the kids with us and they are watching the TV in the man van. I know Toy Story by heart, beginning to end.

Redbeard76 said...

//20 seconds of that before my ears started bleeding and I went mercifully deaf.//

It does that to you too Cake? Now I'm not knocking Hip Hop as a whole, it used to be really good in the old school style, and occasionally it still is, but really most of it now is absolute rubbish.

Tex said...

I'm the red dot :)

Redbeard76 said...

I see y'all! I'm the blue dot of course.

Tex said...

rubbish. i like that word.
dayum...this map thing is sorta fun to see where all they come from

Redbeard76 said...

It's really fun to say, especially when you stretch it out emphasizing that something is really bad, like:

RRRUUUUUBBBBBBIIISSSSHHHH!!1!

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