04 December 2007

Born under a bad sign / Chupacabra Week

Another heartbreaking loss to my Spurs on Sunday. Up 2-1 at home, Robbo gives up the equalizer, Keane is red-carded after a legal looking slide tackle (yellow card at worst, it was nothing flagrant), then the nail in the coffin in the closing minutes, 2-3 Birmingham City. It's absolutely maddening that last year's quality club have sunk so low with wins only against rubbish clubs Wigan and Derby County. Now with their best scorer on the bench after the red card appeal was rejected, things are still looking grim. Yes, I'm a masochist if you must ask.

Now I'm no comedy writer. I barely have a sense of humor according to my wife. But I will still attempt to write something about Chupacabras, being that this is Chupacabra week, so I offer the following:

Top Ten Chupacabra Books: (Little known fact: Chupacabras are quite keen on the literary world!)

10. Green Eggs and Goats

9. To Kill a Chupacabra

8. Chupacabras and Peace

7. Pride and Chupacabras

6. Chupacabras for Dummies

5. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Chupacabras

4. The da Vinci Code

3. How to Win Friends and Influence Goats

2. Jonathan Livingston Chupacabra

1. Goat Soup for the Chupacabra's Soul

p.s. Reward offered for Chupacabra attack on this referee in the Yahoo.co.uk photo above!


Sparkle Plenty said...

HOME RUN! Excellent Chupacabra contribution. I give this five enthusiastic dead goats' hooves' up (so, I dunno, what is that--20 enthusiastic dead hooves total?)

Redbeard76 said...

Aw thanks, I am sort of new to all this silliness.

Lois Lane said...

Ha! Bravo! I think you're doing quite well with all this silliness. :-)

cake said...

The fact that you haven't run screaming yet bodes well for you.

Or should worry you...I'm not actually sure.

1) The Chupacabra in the Rye
2) The Chupacabra's Guide to the Galaxy
3) The Chupacabra of the Baskervilles
4) Goat of Green Gables
5) The Chupacabra of Oz

Hmmm...surely I can do better than that. Maybe I need more coffee...

Redbeard76 said...

In all honestly I almost did when IANO said I was a dude with a womb. But we're way past that now. I'm now waist deep in a chupacabra's mouth!

cake said...

If Ian Fleming wrote chupacabra-based spy novels:

- Chupacabra Royale
- Live and Let Goats
- Goatraker
- Chupacabras Are Forever
- From Chupacabras with Goats
- Dr. Chupacabra
- Goatfinger
- For Your Chupacabras Only
- Thundergoat
- The Chupacabra Who Loved Goats
- On Her Majesty's Secret Chupacabra
- Goats Only Live Twice
- The Man with the Golden Chupacabra

coffee said...

out of all the mythical, blood sucking creatures out there, the Chupacabra is almost certainly the sneakiest

Label Cloud

Powered By:Blogger Widgets